Stress isn't always bad.

 Let's talk about stress this week.  I have been hearing from clients about stress and what to do about it.

Before we get into stress, let's start with feelings.  It is ok to feel things.  

    -It is ok to feel overwhelmed.  

    -It is ok to feel sad.

    -It is ok to feel happy.

    -It is ok to anxious.   

    -It is ok to feel excited.  

I could go on and on with different feelings, but the point I would love for you to understand is -it is ok to feel feelings.- 

There is a message that is being spread.  Be happy, if you are not happy then something is wrong with you.  (My disclaimer: there is chemical imbalances that cause anxiety and depression, yes, go to a clinical specialist or doctor for that.  I am just talking about typical feelings.) But there is nothing wrong with you if you are feeling negative feelings.  

Ok now back to stress.  Definition of stress is "a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances."  Your feelings of stress are normal.  It is part of being human.  Is it fun to feel a lot of stress?  No.  But we can control our emotions and our thoughts. We just need to get to the bottom of our thoughts and change our focus. 

Believing that stress is bad for us is what causes problems.  I have been reading up and listening to Kelly McGonigal PHD.  She has a TED Talk and she has literally written the book on stress.  This is a great quote from her.  "When stress feels against your will and out of your control, if it’s completely devoid of meaning and if it isolates you from others, that’s what I mean by having a toxic relationship to stress. And if you have that kind of stress, then it really is associated with the consequences that we fear. Yet there is as much or more research that shows stress doesn’t increase the risk of depression or other harmful health outcomes when you have a different relationship to it. It’s how you think about stress that determines how it affects you. And many times, how we think about stress is the only thing we can control."

This is the point I am trying to teach you.  It is your thoughts about stress and really, being stressed about stress that is causing you harm.  We need to find out the cause of our stress and how to fix it.  Stress causes depression and anxiety.  If we look at the layer of why are we stressed, what is causing you to feel this way.  Instead of just stressing our and worrying about things, let's look at the overall issues.  

I will be on instagram stories (click here to find me) this week sharing ideas on reducing stress and feeling more in control of negative feelings.  Head there to hear more or...

Text, call or set up an appointment here and we can work through and practice how you are going to think.